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1. Talk to John 3000.

 

2. Pick up adaptor/plug.

-Use on the cable and talk to John.

 

3. Get John in the Mood.

 

-Pick up Sean Sensualstein record, give ot John 3000.

 

4. Get Directions from Doug

 

-Open Mailbox.

-Click on mailbox in inventory x2.

-Give postcard to Doug.

 

5. Talk To Space Cadet.

 

-Pickup/use TV to get his attention

 

6. Get Severed head

 

-Pick up Knife in tree at the the drug dealers gates.

-Pick up rocket at Space Cadets.

-Go to Paradigms shop.

-Pick up ethanol on caravan.

-drop both ethanol and vodka into Igorshki’s bowl.

-Pick up the cone.

-Combine Cone with Rocket.

-Launch rocket at Butt Mountain.

-Use knife on manikin at The Cones junkyard.

-Pick up head.

-Pick up police hat in same area.

-Combine hat and head.

-Go to drug dealer gates and use combined hat and head on intercom.

 

7. Boosting Thugs

 

-Talk to drug dealer, convince him to give you drugs for beating boosting thugs

-Controller is shitty and sticky, go to Paradigms shop and pick up a new controller.

-Replace controller

-Play Boosting Thugs

-You now need a code to cheat and it’s solution is in the radio advertisements. Specifically the MegaBro advertisements: Zeldario Zany man X Zone is the solution

= Z Z X Z

-Give money to Stef the Octopus, receive drugs.

 

8. Stupid Robot in my way

-Talk to Robot Henchman.

-Ask him if he has any hopes and dreams.

 

9. Get Out of Office Jail

 

-Open left cupboard.

-Pick up cup.

-Pick up marker.

-Combine marker and cup.

-Cut water cooler house with knife.

-Use special DUPA cup on water cooler.

-Drink him to death.

 

10. Collect The Scientist

 

10.1 Leg 1

-Pick up lance from the Lobby.

-Use lance on leg in Hallway 1.

 

10.2 Arm 1  

 -Pick up arm in Lab

 

10.3 Leg 2

- Go to the Glam Metal Church.

- Talk to Glam Metal Nun and get toffee.

- Go to vending machine in Hallway 3.

- Use toffee on arm.

- Use toffee arm on Instant Swedish Human.

- Give Instant Swedish Human to leg in Church of Glam.

 

10.4 Arm 2

- Go to the Elevator

- Look at the code written on the walls Scientists are hot, Maintenance guys are 10x hotter

-Now look at the elevator buttons. Turn on maintenance (top left button) and input the code

 Scientists are hot =Lab button x1 Maintenance guys are 10x hotter= Maintenance button x10

-Pick up arm

 

10.5 Head

-Go to the HeadMart

-Try to retrieve head on computer: Should now unlock glitch room.

- Enter Glitch room via Elevator.

-Once gone through the whole sequence, move paradigm close to the foreground till he is large. Choose “lock size” on the interface: Now pick up the paper from recycle bin.

-Choose “pen” on interface. Pick it up.

-Choose “Jacks folder” and use it. Use the Laser gun from it on the email icon.

- Pick up email.

-Combine the paper, the email and the pen.

-Now use the passive aggressive letter on the mailbox.

-Once you have finished turning the wifi on, go back to the Lab, look at the post it notes to get the Scientists name.

-Go back to HeadMart and retrieve the Scientists head from the computer.

 

10.6

-Return all body parts to the Teleport machine in the Lab. Once the cut scene is done, press the yellow button three times. 

 

11. Destroy the Translator

 

-Clone Paradigm 3 times. Place each clone in each of the four translated areas.

-Use big floppy on the computer after clones are combusted and translator exploded.

 

12. Collect Ingredients to Defeat Olof

 

12.1 The Dirt

 

-Go to Hallway 3 and purchase a screwdriver cupcake with your voucher.

-Click on cupcake in inventory to separate screwdriver.

-Go down the hatch in the Lab and use the screwdriver on Hammer Prodigy.

-Use now flat screwdriver on art piece screw.

-Go to the lobby and the use flat screwdriver on cursed flowers to make it a mini flat screwdriver.

-Go back to the dungeon and use mini flat on the art piece screws.

-Pick up dirt.

 

12.2 The Seeds

 

-Go to the Lobby, pick up the bobble head.

-Go to the Church and use the bobble head or use bobble head on the confession box.

-Use the whiskey perfume on the offerings table.

-Pick up donation money.

-Go to hallway 3 and use money to purchase seeds.


 

12.3 Necklace

 

-Go to Hallway 2 if you haven’t already, press button and pick up laser pointer.

-Go to Church and challenge Pug to turn based combat.

-Use the laser pointer.

 

12.4 I Got All The Ingredients

 

-Go talk to Rebel Leader now that you have all the ingredients.

-Head to the Lobby and use the necklace on the door.

 

13. Defeat the Water Heater

 

-Pick up shoe.

-Use shoe on robot poop.

-Use shoe with robot poop on wrench.

-Open slidy door at the top left.

-Use wrench with gears.

-Turn on transfer machine so it breaks.

-Lead Water Heater to the sucking vent.

-Make sure to time it correctly, otherwise Water Heater will move away and poop instead of being sucked up.

 

14. Scam Nun

 

-Use Glam Number on Payphone

-Walk towards sloth head and should activate sequence

 

15. The Final Showdown

 

-Look at the security terminal.

-Go through the monologue and choose the “actual ending” for the real ending.

-Unplug the potato power.

-Use Knife on Chunder can.

-Pick up the maximum amount of energy bars and one protein bar.

-Give one protein bar to the Gym Rat.

-Eat all the energy bars (You should become super fast).

-Unplug the battery power.

-Use dirt on the poop.

-Use the seeds on the dirt.

-You beat Olof.

 

16. Doug Epilogue

 

-Go to Paradigms room, talk to John, ask for Paradigm.

-Keep progressing through screens till you enter Woof Woof tunnel.

-You finished the game!

Hey, it's me. Paradigm's tumour. You might be thinking, what the heck, how do you write with no hands. Well when Paradigm sleeps I catfish people and use them to write various documents of mine. I used to do it legitimately, but you know. Paradigm is broke as shit. Anyway with my vague intution, I basically know how Paradigms life is going to pan out. So here it is. It's my first time writing one these haha, so take it easy on me. I'm just a blob of flesh after all.

Legal Stuff: 

Please don't steal.

Paradigm

Complete Walkthrough

By: Paradigms Tumour

Email: contact me on Geocities instead please. 

Version: 1.05123

04/04/2017 01:43